Precautionary Steps or Simply Just Don’t?

Salam and hi everyone.

First of all, sorry for being on a hiatus for so long. Today, I just feel like sharing my opinion on something that has forever been debated on all social media platforms. This is going to be rather long so move on to another page if you’re feeling lazy to read  hehe.

So here’s my take on:-

 “Is it the women’s or men’s fault for rape to happen?”

My answer? Both should take precautionary steps. But hold uppppp!

My justification isn’t something similar to other people’s - this is based on my personal observations and readings on many people’s reasonings. And of course, this is only my opinion, from my own perspective. Feel free to agree or disagree for we don’t always share the same perspective. :) I hope if you’re reading this, you can try to view this issue from a different angle.

Okayyyy, enough with my babblings-

My take on this is with religious views being put aside. It is purely from my own logical thinkings. However, this isn’t to say that my religious, familial and environmental backgrounds aren’t playing any major roles in shaping these thinkings. And also, this isn’t to say that I reject any religious and cultural believes.

So, moving on..

I always believe that an idealistic world isn’t realistic to be applicable into the real world. Why, you may ask? This believe is due to the people who inhabit this world. I sound a little pessimistic, am I not?

Again, why exactly? It is because of us. The people’s mentalities, the people’s tendencies. Ego.

Realistically, for whatever systems that we may actually apply, for whatever ideologies that we may actually follow or support, not everyone is actually really “following” them. Hence, the “blaming” syndrome and “victim” mentality will always happen because not everyone actually, realises that it is really one’s fault or one’s responsibility to commit, or to prevent harm from happening. Some of them are simply hiding behind the “systems” or “believes”.

To them, it is always others’ faults, others to blame for. You also might often see many of their justifications are actually from legit facts, however, have been taken only halves from the actual whole facts. I’d call this as “cherry-picking”.

I only use this “fact” as it suits my ego, my logic.

I believe, this is the reason why many criminals still don’t think that the crimes they commited are actually crimes and that they think they don’t deserve to be punished because of it. There’s simply no guilt, because from their logic, they aren’t guilty.

You see, some people view some of criminal acts as something that are bound to happen due to other people’s behaviours, not because of their own actions.

“Oh she also threw the rubbish here, why can’t I?”

“He left his wallet unattended, finders keepers”

Believe it or not, they are many people like this. However in rape cases, it’s not as simple as that. It’s not as simple as “they didn’t lock the door, that’s why the burglary happened”. It is not really a situation where really desperate people only have the option to commit in order to survive.

Let me cut this straight - we can’t really do anything if a person is HORNY but FEEL ENTITLED to get themselves satisfied in any ways, and have the audacity to say “She’s asking for it”.

Tell them to lower their gaze? Nah, do you think these people will really listen?

Tell the girls/women to cover up? Also nahhh, even the most modest ones also got raped. Sick world we’re living in.

Teach them boys since young to respect girls/women? Yes, we can do this. But realistically speaking, how many will do this? Also, how many will continue practicing this when they grow up?-

This is actually, an ideal way, but again, realistically, are we really living in an ideal world? Is the ideal world is now? Like currently happening? Wait, do you really feel an ideal world will ever going to happen?

Call me a pessimist, because I just can’t really be optimistic about this.

To me, there is never an ideal world. For we are living in a world with sick-minded people. These people could be anyone. They could be anywhere. They could look like anyone. A pious? A father? A brother? A friend? A relative? A stranger? Anyone. It will happen if they chose to make it happen.

I don’t want to give any real lives examples because there are many. You can google them up. I don’t want to give any articles because of the risks of cherry-picking. I want you to go do your own research and analyse them yourself. Be aware of it and make your own critical judgments. Be an informed person. The least we can really do is to be informed. Then? Spread the awareness.

There won’t be any prisons if we are really living in an ideal world. This earth has aged billion years, with many civilisations, many generations, going through many systems, many believes, but crimes happened and they still happen.

We can’t simply trust anyone, because criminals can hide behind familiar faces too. Yes, this is scary.

I’m sad to say this but we, especially girls/women, unfortunately we really have to always be on guards. The world is unfair. As long as there are people who still  aren’t being responsible over something that they do exist, crimes will always happen.

Because this isn’t an ideal world.

Yes, I am sorry girls........truly, I am sorry for not standing up for us......

If you have the luxury of time, finance and health, go learn some basic self-defenses and take what-so-ever precautionary steps that you think may help you from this unfortunate event.

Because again, I just don’t think that we are living in our dream world...

There are indeed many boys/men who are aware of their own responsibilities. However sadly, there are many of those who chose to stay ignorant too. We can only educate them so much, but if they chose to only live in their own bubbles, there is nothing we can actually do...but to give up on them? Never. Educate people as many as we can. Some would listen, some would not. At least the risk will be lowered.....yes it’s the harsh truth, but the risk is still there.

I always believe that “Lower your gaze” and “Dress decently” apply to both genders because why? Well, women can rape too. There will be people who are bound to ignore these because many are still bertuhankan nafsu syaitan. (I honestly don’t know how to phrase this properly in English. My apology to English speakers.)

This also applies to any types of sexual harassments.

So everyone out there, as we are living in the “real” world, an “ideal” world would probably isn’t going to happen. Therefore, I stand with both genders taking precautions.  However, if the crime happens in any circumstances, it will always be the perpetrator’s fault, for they simply can’t even control their own urges. You raped people, it’s your damn fault and you to blame, not the victim.

So, don’t use the “victim” card. You’re just making yourself look stupider than you actually are. Period.

Last but not least, let’s learn to respect everyone with dignity and compassion as we are all responsible for every action that we take.

Thank you for reading this.